Leaving

By Bethlorr

“Make sure the girls have their sweaters on, Diana, before you take them out.”

“Yes, Mom,” the twelve year old called from the bedroom that she shared with her 2 year old twin sisters. “If I can find them in this mess, that is,” she muttered under her breath as she surveyed the disaster of their small room. Neatness wasn’t one of Di’s strong points – something she shared with her good friend Trixie. And of course, two little girls in the throes of the terrible twos enjoyed “uncleaning” much more than cleaning!

“Sweeties, do you know where your sweaters are?” Di asked, hopelessly. Two sets of bright blue eyes looked up at her from under matching masses of black curls. ‘How I wish I had those curls,’ Di thought enviously for the millionth time as she waited for an answer from either girl.

As expected, Hannah cried out, “No! Uh-uh, no!”

Annamarie, however, caught on to what her big sister wanted, “Go? Sweat-ter, go?”

“Yes, if we find your sweaters we can go.”

“Go! Go!” both girls chanted.

Then Annamarie turned to Hannah and started to jabber. Diana was never sure what the girls said to each other, but they seemed to understand. In less than a minute, each toddler stood in front of her big sister with a sweater in hand – red for Hannah and blue for Annamarie.

Five minutes later Di was opening the door that led to the hallway of their apartment building. Before they could leave, her mom called,

“Di, don’t be gone too long, it’s a little chilly out.”

Biting back the words she really wanted to say, Diana looked at her mother and replied, “Okay, but you said that you wanted us to go for a walk so you could get some packing done.”

Anne Lynch paused and then smiled, “That’s right, I did ask you to take them for that reason, didn’t I? Well, use your judgment; you’ll know when it’s been long enough for them outside.”

“Yeah, when they start to shiver and turn blue we’ll head back,” Di said half seriously.

‘Diana,” her mother responded in a shocked tone and then softened as she realized her eldest daughter was kidding. “Yeah, just try and get them home before they turn purple.” Mother and daughter both laughed. There hadn’t been as much laughter between them lately and they had both missed it.

“Oh, Di, you can’t go out without a sweater! It’s November!”

Diana paused with the door ajar, “Mom, I’ve got on a long sleeved shirt, I’ll be fine,” Di replied in the exasperated tone that only a 12 year old could express.

“No, here’s that pretty new sweater your dad brought home for you yesterday.”

Reluctantly, Di pulled on the beautiful lavender angora sweater. Before her mom could say anything more, Di headed out with the twins. She hurried them down the hall and down the stairs. Once outside she took a deep breath. The apartment had become so crowded in the past few years – since the arrival of the younger set of twins – but in the last several weeks it had become stifling to Diana - ever since her dad had come home more excited than she had seen him in years.

“Annie, we’ve done it! No more money worries – ever!” Her mother had dropped the old pair of jeans she’d been trying to patch once again for one of the boys and threw herself on her father, “You mean it Lawrence, it’s for real?”

Amid the laughter and tears of joy, Di had managed to figure out that her dad had “played” in some market and got some money and they were going to be able to get a bigger house. The Lynch parents had swept their five children into a large family hug and Di heard her father mumbling things about boats and horses and maids and cooks. Her mother had been talking about new clothes and more bedrooms. Di had later pinched herself to make sure that she hadn’t dreamt it all.

Now, four weeks later, it seemed as if it must all be part of a nightmare. As her mom and dad talked more and more about a bigger house and more cars and people to drive the cars and take care of the house, Di worried more and more about what her friends would think. She hadn’t even told Trixie about any of it, not even about the new house. She’d find out soon enough. She sank down on the front stoop to tie her shoe and re-tie Hannah’s little tennis shoes. As she sat there, her mind drifted back…

Two weeks ago her dad had piled them into their cramped little Toyota station wagon. All four twins were strapped into the back seat with the little girls sharing the middle seatbelt that her father had installed for Diana five years before when the boys were born. Di had gratefully climbed in to the back when the girls had been born. Sitting between Terry and Larry had not been pleasant. However, when the girls had still been in their car seats, she’d shared this space with either Terry or Larry and it hadn’t been much fun either. Luckily they hadn’t gone on many long trips since the second set of twins had arrived. Once they’d all been stuffed into the small car, her father had driven them out of town. From her backwards facing position, Di had watched the neighborhood she’d grown up in slowly fade away as her parents animated conversation about their hopes for the future drifted back to her.

She’d noticed that her dad was driving out along Glen Road. Well, if the house her dad had decided to buy was out there, at least she’d be closer to her friend Trixie. There was a big empty house right by Trixie’s family’s farmhouse; it would surely have enough room for all of them. And there was a lake nearby, too, because she’d gone swimming there with Trixie and her older brothers just a couple of months ago. But it was such a big house, Di was afraid that they’d get lost in it. Her dad had turned off Glen Road onto a graveled driveway about a mile from Trixie’s. She’d never noticed it before. It was a long drive, but as they went around the last bend, a large house came into view. Her mother gasped, “Lawrence, are you sure this is the right house?”

“Yes, dear, this is it,” he answered as he parked the car, “Plenty of room for all the kids and then some!”

Anything else her mother had said had been lost amid the clamoring of the boy to be let out and the girls chanting of “Out! Out! Out!” Di had leaned forward to unbuckle Larry and Terry, who opened the doors and dove out of the car. They were on the front porch of the house before Di had even scrambled over the seat so she could get the girls out. Emerging from the car with Hannah on her right and Annamarie on her left, Di got a full view of the house. She gasped. House wasn’t the word for it, mansion was more like it. It looked as if their entire apartment building would fit in it with space to spare! She let the girls pull her over to the front steps where her parents were waiting for them. Her dad pulled out a key from his pocket and said, “Well everyone, let’s take a look at our new house!”

The boys raced in as soon as the door was opened, their sneakers flapped across the highly polished floor and echoed in the empty hall. Soon their shouts could be heard from the second floor. Di, still hanging on to Hannah and Annamarie, silently followed her parents as her dad showed her mother the large living room and den. Next were a parlor and then the dinning room. They went into the kitchen. Di could’ve sworn that their whole apartment could’ve fit in just that one room.

“Not that you’ll be doing much cooking in here, Annie,” Di heard her father say, “Oh no, we’ll have a cook to take care of that!” Di’s heart sank. No more of Mom’s special chocolate chocolate chip cookies? No more magnificent birthday cakes that Mom made from scratch and decorated however the birthday child wanted?”

Before she could ask about that, her parents were already on their way into another room. “This is the art gallery. The former owners had their art collection in here.”

“Lawrence, we don’t have any art work?”

“We will, Anne, we will!”

As they started up the staircase, Di heard her dad ask,” Well, Diana, what do you think?” Without waiting for her response, he went on, “To the left will be where your mom and I will have our room and you too, plus some guest rooms. To the right there’s a nursery and rooms for the twins. There’s also a room where the nannies can stay.”

Nannies! Di hadn’t thought of that! What was her mom going to be doing? No cooking, no taking care of the twins? Maybe she was going to work or something so that they could afford this place.

“Di? Sweetie? Di?”

“Huh, what Mom?” Blinking she looked at her mother, startled.

“Daddy said to pick which room you want,” Anne Lynch looked carefully at her eldest child. There was something not quite right about her expression – must be the surprise of everything.

Without even looking closely, Di pointed at the room she was standing in front of, “This one’s fine.”

“Are you sure, dear?”

“Yes, it’s fine.”

At the end of the hall she noticed another set of stairs. As if reading her mind, her dad said, “Those just lead up to the attic. There’s some old stuff up there from past owners. Nothing exciting.”

That sounded interesting to Diana. Trixie would love to explore that. One rainy afternoon when they’d been in 4^th grade, Di had been playing at Crabapple Farm. Trixie was antsy about being cooped up inside. They were tired of pretending they were pioneers crossing plains like Laura and Mary Ingalls. Neither were overly interested in dolls – between Trixie’s little brother, Bobby, and Larry and Terry, both girls had enough hands-on experience that changing pretend diapers just wasn’t fun. In the end they’d gone up to explore the attic. They had sifted through old magazines and clothes from several generations of the Belden family and had a lot of fun.

As her dad locked the front door he’d asked, “So, Diana, what do you think of our new house?”

“Umm,” Di wasn’t sure how to put into words the myriad of thoughts zooming through her mind. “Umm, we don’t have enough furniture to fill up all of the rooms.”

As her dad’s booming laughter echoed through the evening air, Di mentally kicked herself for giving him such a dumb answer. “Sweetheart, of course we don’t! We’ll be getting all new furniture.” Grabbing her mom and spinning her around on the porch, he finished, “No more yard sale or thrift shop furniture for us, baby!”

“Di-di, go! Go, now!” Annamarie’s plea brought Di back to the present. She was still sitting on the front stoop, with the girls sitting there playing with the leaves, sticks and pebbles that had accumulated on the steps. Now, however, their patience had run out.

Forcing a laugh, Di replied “Alright, twinnies, let’s take our walk!” Grabbing their hands, she led them down the leaf covered sidewalk at a slow, halting pace. Hannah stopped suddenly and bent down. Di grinned. It was the same everyday they took a walk – Hannah had to carry a leaf.

“Mine! Pitty!”

“Yes, sweetie, it’s very pretty. Now we need to find one for Annamarie.”

Annamarie didn’t care quite so much about having a leaf, but accepted the one her twin handed her with a “Tank you!”

Leaves in hands, waving at passers-by, the Lynch sisters continued on their way. Di wasn’t sure where they were headed; she just wanted to take one last walk. Tomorrow night she’d ride the bus, the same one Trixie and her brothers rode, and get off at the end of that long gravel drive and walk up to the house. To a huge building filled with strange furniture and strange people. She knew she was not going to enjoy moving.

“Park! Park!” the girls cried in unison.

Diana saw that they were near the park where she often took the girls. She hurried to her favorite bench near the sandbox. The little girls laughed with joy and started playing with the leaves that had drifted into the box. Di watched them enviously. They had no idea how their world had been turned upside down and after tomorrow would never be the same.

As she kept an eye on the girls, she played idly with a leaf that had been on the bench next to her. Normally, she loved fall – the leaves were so beautiful. Someday she would like paint a fall picture full of the golds and reds and browns of the season. She smiled slightly as she remembered coming with her parents to this very park when she was about the age of her brothers. It had been a Saturday and her mom had brought a thermos of hot chocolate and some cookies, and one of Diana’s favorite lollipops. Her mom had watched as Di’s dad had patiently tossed a small Nerf football to his little girl. She still remembered her dad saying, “Even girls need to know how to catch a football, Anne. And five isn’t too young to begin! Anyway, this is such perfect football weather that I hate to waste it.”

Di’s next vivid memory of that day was running and jumping into a pile of leaves. Her mother’s “No, Di, your lollipop!” cry had reached her too late and she’d emerged with leaves in her hair, her sweatshirt and stuck to her half-eaten lollipop. She’d felt like crying, but her dad had caught her up in a huge hug and whispered in her ear that she had just done one of the best leaf leaps that he’d ever seen.

“Why can’t things be like that anymore?” Di now asked the November sky.

“More?” Hannah piped up. “More?”

“No, sweetie, never mind. Go back to playing.” Di was amazed sometimes at the words her sisters would hear and harp on.

“Uh-uh,” Hannah shook her head, black curls bouncing, “No more. Home!”

“Yes, home, please,” Annamarie added, smiling sweetly at her big sister.

Sighing, Di stood up. They’d been gone for quite awhile – her mom should have some packing done. Taking the girls’ hands, Diana started for home. As they left the park, Annamarie screeched excitedly, “Ball! Di-di, ball!”

Following her sister’s pointing finger, Diana saw a big green pumpkin someone had dumped in a flower bed.

“No, Annamarie, that’s not a ball, it’s a pumpkin.”

“Pump’in?” Annamarie screwed up her face in a grimace, “Eww, no pump’in!”

“Yes, it’s a pumpkin, just not one that’s ready,”

Joined by Hannah, the twins shook their heads, “No, pump’in. Eww!”

Finally able to drag them away from the “Eww!” the girls retraced their steps to the apartment building. Di sighed with relief to not see the new mini van parked out front. That had been the new present her dad had brought home from the city last week. Even though there was a lot more room in the van, Diana hated it. Hardly anyone in Sleepyside had a mini van, everyone had station wagons. The Beldens had a nice station wagon – why hadn’t her dad bought a station wagon. It was just another obvious showing of how the Lynches were different now. Just like this stupid sweater, she thought. Up until recently, most of Diana’s clothes were hand-me-downs from neighbors and yard sales. Her other sweaters were ones that had been her mom’s before all the twins were born. From when her mom had been thin and pretty. She was still kind of pretty, but it was embarrassing sometimes to be seen in public with her. Especially that time during the summer when they’d splurged and taken the twins to the city swimming pool and someone had asked her mom when the new baby was due. Di had wanted to jump into the deep end and sink to the bottom. Her mom had laughed and said no new baby, just trying to get rid of the extra from the last ones. Di knew her mom hadn’t really thought it was funny, because she got a funny pinched look on her face and pulled a T-shirt and sweats on over swimsuit.

Di knew, deep down, that she should be grateful for new clothes, a new house and a new car, but she couldn’t convince herself of it. She hadn’t liked being poor, but she was used to it. She had a feeling that she wasn’t going to like being rich much either. She didn’t like that word, rich. It went along with the words snobby and stuck-up.

“Mommy, home!” Annamarie sang out as Diana unlocked their door.

“Mom-mom, Hi!” Hannah added as both girls pulled away from their big sister and hurled themselves at their mother.

“Did my big girls have fun? What a pretty leaf, Hannah.”

Both girls began babbling excitedly as their mom removed their sweaters. Diana could pick out the words, “Di-di, leafs, pump’in,” and “Eww!” and wondered if her mother understood anything the girls were saying. Tears threatened as she thought of how tomorrow nannies would be taking charge of her little sisters. Would this scene be repeated? Had her parents thought about that? Di shivered thinking of the stories of nannies and governesses that she’d read. The girls would be teenagers before they spent anymore time together.

A few minutes later, once the girls were settled in front of the TV with cookies in hand watching a Care Bears video on the new VCR, another family present Dad had brought home, Di asked her mom, “Did you get much packing done?”

Sheepishly her mom shook her head, “No, I got sidetracked. It’s not that important anyway, your father’s hired some professional movers to pack up everything here and move it over to the attic of the new house. Most of the furniture we’re just going to leave here. We don’t need it anymore.”

“What about our stuff?”

“Well, most of your clothes are rather worn – this weekend we’re going on a big shopping spree to get us all some new and more appropriate clothes.”

Diana was afraid to ask what her mom meant by ‘appropriate.’ Instead she asked, “And my books and the little ones toys? What about all of that?”

“The movers will take care of it and the maids will put what is suitable in your rooms.”

‘Suitable?’ That was as scary as ‘Appropriate.’

“Oh and Diana, you’re going to love your new room.”

‘Of course I am,’ Di thought. That had been the one thing that had kind of excited her – helping to choose the décor for her new bedroom. She’d chose pale lilac paint for the walls with a rainbow bedspread and matching curtains. The carpeting was going to also be lilac – several shades darker than the walls. She’d been hoping to get the rainbow bedspread for Christmas. It was the only things she’d been going to ask for because it was kind of expensive. Now that cost didn’t matter, she knew she’d get it. It was the one thing that was helping to make all these changes bearable.

Suddenly her mother’s words penetrated her rainbow-colored dreams, “You didn’t have your heart set on the lilac paint, did you, dear? The decorator came up with such a lovely color scheme – royal blue and gold. In fact, we’re going to use it as a theme throughout the entire house. You’ll love how your room is going to be done – it’s much more appropriate for a girl of your age and station.”

There was that ‘appropriate’ word again! “But Mom, what about the rainbow bedspread? It was so pretty!” The tears were back again.

“Of course it was dear, but, as the decorator pointed out it was a bit juvenile for someone about to turn thirteen.”

“I won’t be thirteen until next July!”

“Oh, Diana, the gold bedspreads and curtains are so much nicer. And the royal blue throw rugs help to show off the hard wood floor.”

As Diana sat there, biting her lips to hold back the tears and angry words, her mother’s voice softened, “Sweetie, your Dad and I want everything to be perfect for you and your brothers and sisters. While you girls were out this afternoon, I was looking through the things in this little old trunk that was my mother’s. Di, I want you to have so much more than I had.”

Diana knew that her mother meant well. Her mom’s parents had died when she was young and she’d eventually been adopted by her foster family. They had cared for her and loved her in their own way, but had been quite strict. At times, Di had heard her dad say she spoiled the kids too much and her mom had answered in the same way, “I want them to have what I didn’t have.”

Not sure what to say, Di looked at the small pile of pictures and letters by the trunk. A picture of a young man was on top of the pile. There was something about him that looked familiar. Still fighting back tears of disappointment, she picked it up, “Mom, who is this?”

Her mom glanced at the picture and smiled sadly, “That’s my brother, your Uncle Monty.”

“What? You have a brother?” ‘Just what I need,’ Di thought, ‘More surprise news!’

“He’s quite a bit older than I am – he left home when I wasn’t very old. All I really remember of him are stories that my parents told me before they died and what his few letters home said. He was in Arizona according to his last letter, but that was about 25 years ago.”

“Wow, a long-lost relative,” Di was surprised out of her disappointment over her new room, “It’s like a book or something.”

“I know. Actually the last several weeks have been like something out of a fairytale.” Mother and daughter shared one of their rare smiles together. “You know what, Di,” her mother’s blue eyes shone, “Once we get situated in our new home and our new life, I think your dad and I might hire investigators to find your Uncle Monty. Wouldn’t it be great to find my big brother?”

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

WELL, THIS STORY TOOK A TOTAL TURN FROM WHAT I’D ORIGINALLY PLANNED! I’D BEEN GOING TO WRITE A SIMPLE STORY ABOUT DI TAKING A WALK WITH HER LITTLE SISTERS, SHUFFLING THROUGH THE FALL LEAVES – INSPIRED BY A WALK I TOOK WITH MY SON AND THE OTHER LITTLE BOY THAT I BABYSIT. HOWEVER, MISS DI WANTED ANOTHER STORY TO BE TOLD – WHAT SHE FELT ABOUT HER FAMILY’S SUDDENLY ACQUIRED WEALTH.

SOME OF THESE INCIDENTS ARE LOOSELY BASED ON MY OWN LIFE AT THE AGE OF 12 – EXCEPT MY FAMILY NEVER BECAME RICH OVERNIGHT J. THERE’S 12 YEARS BETWEEN MY YOUNGEST SISTER AND MYSELF AND WE SHARED A ROOM THAT WAS RARELY CLEAN. THIS STORY IS SET IN THE FALL OF 1985 (NOT SURE IF THAT FITS PERFECTLY IN MY TIMELINE OF MY OTHER STORIES, BUT WE’LL PRETEND THAT IT DOES). MY FAMILY HAD A TOYOTA STATION WAGON – THE MIDDLE SEAT BELT HAD BEEN INSTALLED WHEN SARAH WAS BORN AND WHEN CARRIE CAME ALONG I WAS BUMPED TO THE BACK CARGO AREA. BUT ONLY FOR TWO MONTHS AND THEN WE GOT A MINI VAN. I WANTED A RAINBOW BEDSPREAD THAT I’D SEEN IN THE SEARS CATALOG WHEN I WAS AROUND THAT AGE AND DID EVENTUALLY GET IT FOR CHRISTMAS.

I TOTALLY INVENTED THE PARENTS’ AND GIRL TWINS’ NAMES.

MOST OF THE 2-YEAR OLD PRONUNCIATIONS ARE TAKEN FROM MY SON (19 MONTHS) AND THE LITTLE BOY I BABYSIT (23 MONTHS) AND THE EWW AT THE GREEN PUMPKIN WAS ACTUALLY MY SON’S REACTION TO GREEN BANANAS! AND LIKE HANNAH, HE CAN’T WALK OUT THE DOOR WITHOUT PICKING UP A LEAF.